New Days

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He almost never speaks to me in metaphors, except the tree stuff, and this one time a couple of weeks ago when I was changing the ink cartridge in my printer. I read the instructions, “Push until it clicks”.  And I did push, hard, to the point that I thought the cartridge was going to break, and then, right before it did break, it clicked.  And I was like “Ohhhh, I get it.”

Here’s why- You guys, 2010 almost killed me.  And I refuse to list the bad stuff because that just seems like a waste of time, but believe me when I say I was pressed hard.  And I am the first to admit that I made a whole bunch of bad decisions.  And I am also willing to say that some of the things that happened were not my fault, (an important admission for me, since taking the blame and responsibility for any and every bad thing that happened is one of the things that almost killed me). 

I spent more time than I care to admit heading down the wrong path, and at the end of that path I was confronted with some of the hardest circumstances I have ever encountered.  Actually a couple of times I encountered what I thought were the hardest circumstances I have ever encountered only to be knocked down a little harder a short while later.  It took a couple of ER trips and Four Awful Days to wake me up.  But the good thing about that was I turned around and ran after Jesus.  The even better thing- He was watching and waiting, not far off .  He did in fact scoop me up and tell me how much He loves me.

It was a sweet embrace for sure.  And then, through my tears and heaving sobs, I heard Him ask me a very tough question- “If these things hadn’t happened, would you still be on that path?”  Did I really need to answer?  Absolutely.  Was my answer “I'm so sorry. Please help me. Thank you so much.”-  Yes.  Grieving did ensue, good grieving, the give-it-to-Jesus-let-Him-transform-it kind of grieving. 

I was pushed, almost broken, until it clicked- I need Him and He wants me, not every once in a while- all the time.  Understanding that more clearly than ever before, and letting myself be totally consumed, redeemed by His love, and knowing that He does indeed make all things work together for our good- big time new beginnings happened.   

It’s only been a few months since all of that unfolded but as this New Year approaches I can’t help but think of all of the starting over that has already taken place and feel hopeful that we don’t have to wait for a day on the calendar to tell us it’s time to turn around and go in the other direction.  Whatever changes need to be made can be made at any time.  Every day is a brand new day and all that jazz.  Even more hopeful- He is never far off and ever wanting us to be with Him.  The best- He makes all things work together for the good of those who love Him. 

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Here's to hope and brand new days~

Love, love. 

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