The Oldest

Griffen turned nine on Tuesday. 
Somehow I have a nine year old, doesn't really seem possible.  When he was born my world was totally different. I was eighteen, in so much love and hungry for more.  Griffen was wanted for years.  He was waited for very impatiently.  He was absolutely adored from the second he was born, before really. 
A little sick at first, we couldn't even bring him home until he was eight days old, and oh what an agonizing eight days that was.  He's been a handful since the beginning too.  I clearly remember thinking how wonderful it was when Gabe came along- perfectly easy and simple and quiet.  That was not at all what Griff was like. 
Baby Griff, toddler Griff, boy Griff, was/is anything but easy and simple and quiet.  He is a good kid, he's great actually, he is a lot though.  And I love him for it. 
A dreamer, an anytime of day dreamer.  He said to me just tonight "There is a dream within my mind but I can't remember it, gonna have to think about it." 
His mind never stops; it runs on ahead of him from one idea to the next.  He's a brilliant boy.  He is one of the funniest people I know, and I know a lot of funny people. 
We've grown up together a bit, me and my boy.  We've learned and grown together through some incredibly hard times.  He is now the self proclaimed "Man of the House". 
When I'm driving, he holds my hand, when we're sitting in church, he puts his arm around me.  His heart is big.  He is a lot.
You with your tiny little self, with your birth, you made me a mom.  And that is all I ever wanted to be.  And now you, with your growing self, you make me want to be a better mom every day.  Your eyes are pools Love, and I see greatness in them.  There is greatness in you son, and your willingness to explore and learn and grow is inspiring.   You build, you create, you think, constantly.  You hypothesize, and reason, and explain, constantly. There is just no end to what you can do, and you seem to be pretty aware of that.  My oldest kiddo, having you around is sometimes like living with a fifty year old man.  You do indeed say the darnedest things, too many to list here.  You are wise, and kind, and bright.  You are quick and witty, underrated things to be if you ask me.
You are You always, without exception.  You are more than I ever could have hoped for Griff.  You're amazing boy, you shine. 
Love you so, so much, always


3 Comments to “The Oldest”

  1. I love him. So so much. For all the reasons you said and a million more.

  2. what an amazing thing it is to watch griff grow!

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