Archive for July, 2008

July 22, 2008

having a moment

this moment of emma’s, this little "get your hands off of me, i am not in the mood"  kind of sums up my thoughts for the past week or so.  we have gone from being bored to the point of insanity to being busy to the point of exhaustion, it’s very american of us really.  but this texas heat and this exhausting boredom are making us all a little grumpy.  and for some reason, no matter how tired my kids are, no matter how late they get in bed, they are wide awake at 7am.  what is that? 

oh, well, it’s fine.  thank goodness for chocolate, dark chocolate, preferably with bits of coffee in it.  chocolate makes everything better.  chocolate, and happy music, and dancing and grace.  i love, love, love my kiddies, don’t get me wrong, they all make me happy in lots ways, and they all have moments too.   it’s just that right now, grace makes me happy no matter what.  even when i am having a moment, she makes me happy.  even her fits make me smile.  mostly her smiles make me smile.  and this, this makes me smile.


July 11, 2008

lessons from griff

his favorite flavor of ice cream is pistachio.  he wants to be a "mad scientist" when he grows up.  he’ll take broccoli over chocolate any day.  his favorite thing about himself is his "vocabulary".  i have a notebook full of griffen’s words including "dear God please help me to be a better kid so i can show the world what it’s like to follow Jesus." from august of 2006 and a poem he wrote and memorized when he was 5:
egg nog, egg nog
i like it when you make eggs
penguins belong with you
because they like that stuff

the kid either makes perfect sense or none at all.  he is quirky as all get out. 

he was talking to gabe a couple of days ago and he said "gabe you need to learn to be calm.  and if you want to be calm, you need to have a reason to be calm.  what’s your reason?"  a slightly confused and mostly uninterested gabe said "um, i don’t know."  griff replied, "ok, here’s your reason for being calm- you don’t want to hurt your family and friends.  when you’re not calm, you get wild and out of control, so you need to learn how to stay calm.  if you want to be calm, you need to have confidence.  confidence means you know that you’re ok even when everything else is not ok.  so, let’s practice having confidence.  we’re going to play tic-tac-toe."  so they went to play tic-tac-toe and griffen wins and then he says "ok, now you lost, what are you gonna do, say ok or get mad? and gabe says "i think i’ll say, let’s play again" and griffen says, "well, first you have to be ok with losing.  so, are you?" and gabe says "yes, now lets play again."  so a few minutes later, they are in the living room and griffen says "ok, now we’re going to learn about some other things.  let’s say you’re at a store and you want a movie, but you only have a penny.  what do you do, steal it or go home without it?"  and gabe says "just go home".  griff says "good.  now let’s say you’re at a restaurant and there’s a gourmet meal on the menu with all of your favorite ingredients and your family doesn’t order it.  what do you do, whine to mom or eat your other food?"  gabe says "umm, eat my food."  griff says, "good, ok good job gabe, and pats him on the shoulder."   

he’s seven.  his eyes are the color of the ocean on a sunny day.  he inherited my freckles.  he’s a little odd maybe, and he’s kind of intent on being a nerd.  he loves to cook.  he’s mostly oblivious to the world outside of his head.  he’s girl crazy and he has more words than anyone i know, all of which i love.Griffey

July 7, 2008


my girl, my emmy has brought so much to my life.  it is both amazing and a little sad to see her growing.  she started coming up to me and saying "mommy, are you finking what i’m finking?" and when i say, "i don’t know em, what are you thinking?" she says, "umm, i don’t know".  and she started "writing" in a notebook.  she sits and scribbles little lines and then brings me the notebook and asks me to read it.  "i don’t know what this says mommy, you read it".  every day she asks and argues about wearing make-up, and she has to have her purse with her everywhere we go, she likes her hair a certain way and she’s totally into shoes.  she is losing what little baby-ness she ever had.  she wants to be a big girl, she wants to be like me.  can i say it is a little jarring to see her mimic my actions and behaviors?  i understand that as her mother it is my job to set a good example and to be intentional about the way i live so that she can mimic my actions and behaviors.  this is not a new concept to me, it’s just becoming more real right now.  she’s a girl now, a little girl maybe, but it seems since she was very little, maybe six months, there was something in her that couldn’t wait to grow up.  people have commented on her photos and said there was "something about her".  i’m not sure exactly what that something is, but it scares me.  she’s got some attitude for sure, not a bad one, just something that you can see in her eyes, kind of like "i know."  it’s like she has some awareness of her beauty and femininity.  how scary is that?   she is three and already, she knows.  and already, she wants to grow up.   

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